One Of Those Days
by Caffey
Summary: [J/C and a little P/T] Voyager is currently housing one severely ticked off Vulcan, and anything slightly out of the ordinary might be enough to break him. As it seems, the command team is spoiling for that...


Disclaimer: Star Trek: Voyager™© is the registered trademark and sole property of Paramount Pictures. This story is non-commercial and for enjoyment only. No copyright infringement is intended until I'll rule the world.

Author's Note: This stems from listening to Lifehouse's "Hanging By A Moment" one too many times. Okay, so I have hardly done anything else since Sunday 4:00 AM. I blame Kadi. She makes me do the strangest things. Hey, what do you need that CPR for? Kadi? Kadi?? I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you...

Rated: PG-13

One of Those Days 

by Caffey

"Okay, so what's the big emergency?" 

Tom was pacing the length of B'Elanna's office, not paying much attention to his wife at first. Usually, that kind of treatment didn't sit well with Voyager's Chief Engineer, but she was making an exception that day. There was something desperate to Tom's movements, and it made her quite a bit nervous. 

"Tom, you feeling okay over there?" 

He paused long enough to shoot her an incredulous stare. "Definitely not." Then he continued pacing, but kept talking. "They're doing it again, B'Elanna." 

Her eyes widened in shock. "You mean--" 

"Exactly," he sighed. 

Slumping down onto her chair, B'Elanna took a few deep breaths to calm down. This couldn't be. It just couldn't. Her day had begun being so good. That in and of iself was quite unusual, one of the very rare occasions in the Delta Quadrant. But she had welcomed it with open arms, anyway. She had not wondered about reason when Tom had surprised her with breakfast in bed. She had not spent a second thought when her engineering staff had told her that they were running ahead of schedule. And she certainly had not complained when Seven had canceled their meeting to help the Doctor run a diagnosis on himself. 

B'Elanna had not questioned her luck, but she should have. 

"Oh, this is bad," Tom said, startling her out of her stupor. "They couldn't have picked a worse time. With Neelix off the ship to collect some food samples, there's no one here who could provide a long enough distraction for us to get hold of them." 

Her husband was certainly right about that, but B'Elanna being B'Elanna she wasn't ready to give up without a good fight. "Who has seen them thus far?" 

"Harry and Seven." 

"Shit." Harry wasn't the problem here. They could count on him to keep his mouth shut, but if Seven breathed a word to anyone about this, they all would be doomed. Tapping her chest, she hailed Seven and ordered her to report to Engineering at once. 

Merely three minutes later, Voyager's resident Ex-Borg strode into B'Elanna's office, looking anything but happy. "You wished to see me?" 

B'Elanna looked at Tom for support, but he was too busy pacing and muttering something that sounded like, "I'm going to kill them." Unfortunately, she could understand him all too well. 

"That's right, Seven." She gestured for Seven to take a seat, and to B'Elanna's surprise, the former Borg actually complied. "You wouldn't have seen something out of the ordinary today? Unusual even for a normal day on Voyager, that is." 

"I am assuming that you are referring to Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay." 

"So you have seen them." B'Elanna sighed. Great. Just great. Could this day get any worse? "Did you talk to anyone about it?" 

"As a matter of fact, I did," Seven replied, seemingly unaware of the quickly darkening face of the Chief Engineer. "However, the Doctor was not very helpful with providing answers. I am still unsure as to why Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay would behave in such a manner." 

Okay, so this day could get worse. Tom seemed to be sharing that insight, as he was banging his head against the door frame by now, attracting Seven's attention as well. 

"Lieutenant Torres, I do not understand why Lieutenant Paris is deliberately damaging himself." 

"Great stress reliever, Seven," B'Elanna quipped. "You should try it." 

"I will consider it." 

Only with great difficulty B'Elanna repressed her laughter. Oh, she'd love to see that, but there were more pressing matters at the moment, and they needed to be tended to. "Did you tell anyone else, except the Doctor?" 

Seven was obviously puzzled by this interrogation, if her raised Borg implant was any indication. "I was on my way to Commander Tuvok when you hailed me." 

"I'll personally wring your neck if you breathe a word to Tuvok." It was the first coherent sentence Tom had spoken since Seven's arrival, and it scared the hell out of Voyager's supposedly unflappable Ex-Borg. 

"I do not understand." 

Tom threw his hands up in exasperation, glaring at Seven. If glares were able to kill, Seven would be doomed. "You'll adapt!" 

"Excuse us for a moment, Seven." B'Elanna got up and seized her husband by the shoulders, literally shaking some sense into him. Then she whispered something in his ear that definitely made his day, if the blooming smile on his face was any indication. 

When B'Elanna sat down again, focusing her attention back on Seven, she could barely hide a grin. "Okay, where were we? Oh yes." Her eyes narrowed. "Listen to me, Seven. The current situation is of a very delicate nature. Do _not_ mention it to Tuvok. Tom and I are going to handle it, but if Tuvok hears of this, all will be lost. And no, you don't have to understand," B'Elanna added as Seven opened her mouth, "just comply. Did I make myself clear?" Seven nodded once, perturbed. "Good. Do you know if the Doctor talked to anyone about it?" 

"That is impossible. The Doctor's program is offline for maintenance." 

"Thank God for small wonders! Okay, so no--" 

"Lieutenant Torres!" Carey peeked into her office, out of breath and looking more than a little disturbed. "You'd better come here and see this for youself!" 

This couldn't be good. B'Elanna mind screamed at her to kill herself now, and be done with it. For just a second, her desire to do just that and her curiosity battled for supremacy. Naturally, the latter won. Suicide wouldn't look good on her record for Stovokor. 

She was up and out of her office in record time see what was up in Engineering. The sight that greeted her stopped her dead in her tracks, though. 

"We're so dead," Tom breathed, nearly bumping into his wife. 

B'Elanna couldn't but agree with him. There on the main level Commander Chakotay was chasing Captain Janeway. The latter was giggling in glee as she dodged a perplexed crew member. But despite all, B'Elanna noticed that she had never seen either of them this happy. The Captain's cheeks were flushed a deep red, though whether that stemmed from exertion or pure joy, B'Elanna couldn't tell. Chakotay looked equally red. And both had huge, silly grins on their faces. 

By the time B'Elanna snapped out of her stupor, the command team was running in circles around the warp core. If Tuvok ever found out about this, there would be hell to pay. Voyager was currently housing one severely ticked off Vulcan, as it was. This was the kind of thing that would break even the most stoic, best trained Vulcan, and Tuvok was not even close to being that at the moment. 

"Tuvok to Torres." Speak of the devil -- well, think of him, anyway. 

She tapped her commbadge. "Torres here. Go ahead." 

"I know." One could almost hear the vein throbbing behind his temple. 

She should have killed herself when she had the opportunoty. 

Stovokor be damned. 

"Who told?" 

"That is none of your concern, Lieutenant. However, it would be best for you and Mr. Paris to put an end to Captain Janeway's and Commander Chakotay's 'performance' at once." 

"A serious threat from Tuvok?" Tom whispered in her ear, stunned. 

Severely ticked off indeed. 

"Understood, Tuvok. Torres out." 

Who was she to argue with their resident Vulcan? She might have a death wish, but she was not suicidal. 

"Okay," B'Elanna said. "Stop them. Great. How are we going to do that? Suggestions, anyone?" 

Seven, who had joined them by now, was far too fascinated by the command team to pay attention to B'Elanna. Tom looked puzzled, a frown etching itself onto his forehead. "Chakotay is gaining on her, from the looks of it," he commented. "Give the Old Man a couple of minutes, and this will be over." 

Watching them closely for a few moments, B'Elanna nodded. Yep, Chakotay was definitely getting closer, and Captain Janeway seemed to have no clue. They were still chasing around the warp core, but just as it was getting too boring to watch, the Captain changed directions all of a sudden. She headed straight for B'Elanna office, Chakotay closely behind her. 

B'Elanna's eyes widened when she realized that she had exactly two options: either move the hell out of their way or get run over by them. Making a snatch at Tom's colar, she dragged him along as she left the hazardous area at warp speed. 

Seven didn't get as lucky. 

Captain Janeway's attempt at breaking the speed record was put to a sudden end as she bumped right into Voyager's resident Ex-Borg. Chakotay was next. There were some muffled groans and moans when all three of them hit the ground with a loud thud. 

Silence. 

"Gotcha," Chakotay cheered. 

Tom and B'Elanna were watching from a safe distance, shaking their heads in amusement at the command team and Seven. These three had definitely some difficulty in picking themselves off of the floor. Every time they were close to succeeding, one of them would lose their balance, and down they went. 

Tom nudged B'Elanna. "You think Tuvok'll ever get back to normal if he hears about this?" 

"On the contrary, it'll finish him off." 

"Let's tell him, then." 

Maybe this day wasn't so bad, after all. The End 

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Story copyrighted © 2001 by Jana "Caffey" Prillwitz


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